Funny, in my experience its the Dad’s who can be hesitant regarding hiring a Doula. Many comments like “well its a lot of money to spend just before baby”, “We are having a hospital birth so we will have a nurse”, “I’ll be there to support you through the whole thing and I don’t want someone replacing my role”…. and so on. Of course these are all valid concerns and usually, in my experience, the dad’s will end that conversation with “but you’re pushing baby out so its your decision”, but the skepticism is present. I love supporting theses families because that usually means when baby arrives I get to see dad so thrilled and the look on dad’s face says it all “I’m so glad we hired a doula” !
My Role as a Doula (and certainly all the AMAZING Doula’s I know and have worked with) is never to take over dad’s role. It is rather to help him know how to support, to offer him support and reassure him that his partner CAN do this, she is STRONG and so is he. I offer practical advise, preparation and calm to the birth. Sometimes the calm I need to instill is in the dad (or partner). It is not easy to see a loved one in pain, and sometimes its hard to remember than this pain is a good pain, it brings baby. Doula’s come with a bag full of tools, real practical knowledge of birth, education and otherwise. They can help you in a healthy and safe way to be up and caring for your babe sooner, offer advise where to seek other support if needed (such as lactation consultants and well-baby clinics) and so much more.
SO to all the Dad’s (or partners) that are wondering if its financially “worth it” to hire a Doula, talk to other dads that have had a Doula! If you are worried about the cost’s, this is quite possibly the most important event in your life, the arrival of a tiny human being, is there really a cost too high to making the entry to this world a happy and joyful event?
Most Doula’s are quite reasonably priced, especially when you consider we are ON CALL until baby is born, we are there for as long as you need us, and we meet you before and after. When you sit down and think about hourly rates, parking and supply costs, many Ottawa based doula’s barely make minimum wage, and on top of that if we have other day jobs or children of our own we are dropping it all to be at your side. Please reconsider when you tell a Doula her cost is too high!
With love and appreciation to all the AMAZING Doula’s and to all the amazingly supportive partners out there!